So now I ride a bicycle

Having children changes you.  You see things in a different light.   Most the time I am reminded about all the crap I put my parents through and what might be waiting for me when our boys get older.  

Well in the course of raising our boys have come with a few bumps and bruises and of course bloodshed and tears.  Some of the hardest for me have come through teaching them how to ride a bike.  I got first hand view on how God must seen me.  

First, there is the actual taking them into getting on the bike without the security of the training wheels for the first time.  Totally gripped by fear they cling to the bike like it has been part of them since birth.  As I would try to steady them so we could begin our journey down the drive way they wily beg and plead for me not to let them go.  

Then of course after a few trips back forth their courage grew.  Much like how our spiritual courage grows when Jesus begins to show us how to do the things he has equipped us to do.  

Then of course comes the fateful words "Let me go Dad!"  I hesitate at first then ask them are they sure?  With a voice of excitement they repeat again "Let me go!"  So I release them and observe their victory.  Although sometimes the victory is a short lived one.  As the crash into ground scrapping the flesh from elbows and knee caps which unleashes a flood of tears.  

As they looked back at me in a moment of disbelief and anger.  The thought of how could I have let that happen to them.  Like I was the cause of the wipeout.  

I catch a glimpse of what has gone on between God and myself.  As I pint out how He failed me or didn't protect me from certain devastation.

Then I hear myself say "You're OK." as I wipe the tears from their eyes and the gravel from their wounds.  Their world has been reduced to one moment of complete terror.  

So often I have found myself in the same scenario where I ask Jesus to use me and things end up in a hurtful bloody mess.  However even though those moments take place we still get back and climb back on the bike.

Why for the moments when we don't wipeout and learn a new trick that leaves us with sense of pure nirvana!!  

So now today I ride a bicycle so I can see how Jesus might use me to help others that might feel like they wiped out or that they feel like God abandoned them.